shame is so in this season

money power and booze

according to the good (and by good i mean morally upstanding) folks at ap, drink more to earn more. let's take a closer look, shall we?

"Social drinking builds social capital," said Edward Stringham, an economics professor at San Jose State University and co-author of the study with fellow researcher Bethany Peters.

san jose state... isn't that a party school? bethany peters... isn't that the chick he hooked up with at that totally raging econ party? yeah, she was the one with the demand. pull. inflation. shirt on.

"We created our hypothesis through casual observation and examination of scholarly accounts," the authors said.

translation: "we tested our hypothesis by drinking ourselves to oblivion. it was awesome," the authors said.

"Drinkers typically tend to be more social than abstainers."

um, duh.

"Drinkers may be able to socialize more with clients and co-workers, giving drinkers an advantage in important relationships," the researchers said.

here's an example of how this works: john doe goes out with his clients and co-workers. they end up splitting 6 pitchers between the 4 of them. they move on to tequila shots. somebody dances on the bar, somebody passes out, somebody vomits in one of the empty pitchers, somebody sulks in the corner because somebody thought it would be funny to punch the wall but now somebody's hand might be broken, and last but certainly not least, somebody leaves with somebody. and somebody else. the "advantage in important relationships" here is called that special bond between everyone sharing that special experience... otherwise known as blackmail.

"Drinking may also provide individuals with opportunities to learn people, business, and social skills."

learning how to open your throat is definitely an example of a people, business and social skill.

"One of the unintended consequences of alcohol restrictions is that they push drinking into private settings. This occurred during the Alcohol Prohibition of 1920-1933 and is happening on college campuses today. By preventing people from drinking in public, anti-alcohol policies eliminate one of the most important aspects of drinking: increased social capital."

so you're saying that the great depression was not a direct result of the coolidge's policies or the lack of available capital or the interdependence of global loans following ww1 or the great stock market crash of 1929, but rather motivated solely by the prohibition, because it didn't allow people to increase their social capital and thus prevent all of the aforementioned causes? interesting. very interesting indeed.

The researchers found some differences in the economic effects of drinking among men and women. They concluded that men who drink earn 10 percent more than abstainers and women drinkers earn 14 percent more than non-drinkers. However, unlike men, who get a seven percent income boost from drinking in bars, women who frequent bars at least once per month do not show higher earnings than women drinkers who do not visit bars.

it's a simple explanation: women must work harder to earn as much money as men. they don't have time to drink in bars because they're too busy working hard and ignoring their families and friends. then they go home at 3am every day to pour themselves to sleep.

"Perhaps women increase social capital apart from drinking in bars," the researchers said in an effort to explain the gender gap.

women increase social capital by forming cliques and putting down others with less power or status. haven't you seen mean girls?

posted by erica @ 1:43 PM