Wednesday, March 28, 2007

ciao, baby

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

pillowfight!

pillowfight in union square this saturday.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

sigh... whatever.

the new girl: is duck sauce made of real duck?
me: no.

Monday, January 29, 2007

i've been meaning to share this one for a while but keep forgetting...

i like soho. i don't love it (mostly because all i can afford is street jewelry and ben's pizza). however, this is just ridiculous - the old tennessee mountain bbq joint is turning into a ... (drumroll please) ... crocs store. you know crocs... those ugly-ass rubber clogs that don the likes of mario batali and midwest stay-at-home moms are soon going to infiltrate the land of high-end fashion. it's across the street from chanel. i'm surprised mr. lagerfeld allowed that to even happen.

seriously? crocs? seriously?

i did a little research... from the crocs website: "reasons you gotta have 'em"

1. nothing's softer and more comfortable... big advertising blunder - don't use superlatives unless scientifically proven. i.e. "nobody doesn't like sara lee" - i'm sure i can find one.

2. big air ventilation points... so everyone can smell the rankness of what happens when your bare feet make love to rubber in 90 degree weather. delish.

3. resists bacteria... except the ones that can get through the "big air ventilation points."

4. friendly italian styling... i'll take those words two at a time, but i'll never associate any of them with crocs. unless it's "friendly italian pasta pusher, mario batali, wears crocs" or "styling your college roommate's deep south weddin' with white crocs to match the taffeta monstrosity she calls a gown."

5. you won't slip off your boat... i'll just push you off for bringing those stupid-ugly shoes on board.

6. others love them too... just save yourself the 30 bucks and go jump off a bridge. i hear others are doing that too...

in other neighborhood news, gold bar - a new swank joint from the better-than-thous who served you cain on a snow white mirror will soon be gracing my neighborhood with velvet ropes, bentleys and attitude. can't. hardly. wait.

Friday, January 26, 2007

holy bajeeeezaaaahhh



rambo called - he wants his right arm back. he also mentioned something about congratulations on the big win. and then brought up the arm thing again.

quote of the day

"damn those lychee martinis. i woke up in brooklyn and shannon woke up in the tribeca grand."
--megs (the champ)

hahahahaha. awesome.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

come again? better yet, don't.

5 minutes ago...
new girl: "what do you call these really fancy squeezy paper clips?"
me: "binder clips."
new girl: "really?"
me: "really."

10 minutes ago...
new girl: "so i think i have a problem... i just rented a van that seats 7 people but then i counted 8 on the list to go and now i don't know what to do." (referring to sending a group of 8 tekkies to an off-site)
me: "maybe you should change the reservation to 2 cars that each hold 4."
new girl: "well, maybe one of the guys can just ride on another guy's lap. i don't really want to call them again."
me: "that's probably not the best idea."
new girl: "well, a girl can dream."
me: "that's nice."

1 hour ago...
new girl: "the diet coke machine is broken. i'm soooo sad."
me: "..."
new girl: "huh?"
me: "nothing."

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

be like me

and waste your life.