shame is so in this season

welcome to the suck

population: orlando bloom


[e-town] "i don't suck." "yes, yes you do." "well, ok."

went to see elizabethtown last night with my mtv sap girls. in a salted pistachio nutshell, it was garden state, as told by cameron crowe. and i'm so glad that i didn't have to pay for the ticket (if i did pay for it, you probably wouldn't hear me rant because of the cognitive dissonance theory). legolas, i mean orlando, was pretty unbelievable as a non-elven human being, let alone an american twentysomething. he should really stick to character roles where his inner overdramatist can really be released (i.e. lotr, pirates, kingdom of heaven). either that or get his ass to winona ryder reality bites acting school. and don't get me started on little miss kiki dunst. her southern accent was as stable as last month's gas prices. instead of actual directing, cameron crowe must just throw his hands in the air and say, "whatever."

the only redeeming characters were paula deen as the permanent kitchen fixture of an aunt and paul schneider as the loser cousin/single father/failed souther rocker jessie (the freebird performance was probably the most entertaining of the entire film). one thing the idiosyncratically talented mr. crowe did manage to pull off was a good soundtrack.

posted by erica @ 10:36 AM